How to Change Your Relationship to Money


On Christmas, when one of my siblings or I opened an expensive gift, you’d hear my Dad declaring in the background, “That wasn’t cheeeeeaaap!” The word cheap was elongated, his eyebrows raised, and a hybrid expression of pride and shock formed his face.

My Dad worked hard. He was a manager in a supermarket produce department. My mom babysat neighborhood kids and family members to make some extra cash. We were never poor, but money was talked about in a way that made it very clear that it did not come easily for us. 

When I was 16 I got a job at the same supermarket my Dad worked at. I didn’t want to work there, with my Dad, but I needed to begin earning money to save for college since if I wanted to go. And a car. I wanted one of those, too. The car was especially important to my 16 year old self living in the sticks, desperate for freedom. 

My mom kept the cash I earned in a fireproof box in her closet. The box was full of rows of white business envelopes labeled, “Michelle, Mark, Cabin Taxes, Christmas…” She was old school, but she was organized. After I purchased my used 1996 Geo Prism I put away all my money for college with $20 to spare for gas and goodies (if there was anything leftover).

I was raised to be responsible with my money. I was also raised within an invisible field of beliefs that none of us knew existed. 

Limiting beliefs hold us back from prosperity.

It took me a long time to realize I was living under a belief system about money that wasn't true. In my late twenties I was running my own business as a graphic designer. In a year and a half I went from charging $350 for a logo to $1500. During that time I had realized I wasn’t valuing my work or myself, that the clients I was working with who weren’t willing to pay much for my time and energy were causing me stress and drama. When I raised my rates not only did I make more money with less effort but I had better clients. My relationship to money began to shift very pragmatically.

When I turned thirty I went through a big spiritual shift. I discovered Breathwork, the tool that would change my life, and my relationship to spirituality itself began to deepen. I started to wake up to the truth that the Universe is abundant, that I was actually always provided for, and that my fears and beliefs were limiting my earning potential. 

The more I began to work with my relationship to the Universe and my beliefs about money the more things began to change.

Money started to flow more easily. I started investing in myself financially by taking business courses and going on spiritual retreats. These changes began to create immediate results.

I switched careers to do my soul work as a Breathwork teacher and mentor. I was able to move into my own apartment which meant doubling my rent. More quality clients began to come to me, and they were also people who were more aligned with the people I wanted to work with. 

The more I work with trusting that I am provided for, focusing on gratitude, and being of service the more seems to flow my way.

Here are a few steps to begin cultivating your own prosperity:

  1. Become conscious of your limiting beliefs.
    I had a lot of limiting beliefs around money which included things like:
    I need to work really hard to make a little bit of money.
    There isn’t enough for us all.
    Money doesn’t come to me easily.
    I don’t need money.
    Money can only be earned through giving up your time.

    Begin to challenge the beliefs around money you were born into. If you find it challenging to see this in yourself look at the way your family views money.
  2. Watch your language
    This one is huge. Pay attention to the way you talk about money. Notice if you say things like, “I’m broke.” When something good happens around money do you easily dismiss it and question if it will happen again? Remove all negative speaking around money. It might feel really challenging at first but the more you work with it the more positive you’ll begin to feel about money.
  3. Trust you’re provided for
    Begin to work with your faith in the Universe, God, whatever word resonates with you. Feel into the deep spiritual truth that everything is always ok. The more you get in touch with this truth the more easily you will be able to speak positively about money and trust that it can flow in easily for you.
  4. Check your emotions
    If you're feeling angry, resistant, or depressed while reading this article or working with money that is a clear sign that there is big work to do in this area. You can use Breathwork or another tool that helps to emotionally detox. 
  5. Be giving
    Pay attention to how protective you are of yourself, your belongings, and other things in your life. How giving are you? How open? Money is an exchange of energy. Begin to give more freely so things can come to you more easily.

These are just a few steps to begin to work with the energy of money. Typically a lack of prosperity can be linked to self worth issues and lack of spiritual trust so it’s a great opportunity to work on healing yourself in deeper ways. 

If you want to really change your relationship to money begin working with these steps for the next month diligently and take note of how your life begins to shift. Don’t get discouraged if it feels challenging. Money is often a deeply rooted emotional energy that can be difficult to shift.

Once the month is up shoot me an email and let me know what's changed.

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