Day 22


Congratulations on accomplishing week three! One more to go! I’d really love to hear how things are shifting for you at this point. If you’ve been participating in every step these past three weeks you’re probably going through a lot of emotional and energetic clearing. And if you’ve missed a lot, it’s all good. Go at your own pace. If it takes longer for you, that’s just what you need.

Before you continue reading this I’d love for you to take a quick pause, head over to the Facebook group, and give me an update with how the course is going for you. Here are some prompts:

  1. Have you had any ah-ha! moments?
  2. What emotions have come up for you in the Change My Life Challenge?
  3. What are you finding most difficult?

I’d really love to hear from you, and like I’ve said before, I read every response.

Go ahead and watch the video above for your Final Change Your Life Challenge or read about it here:

There was this article published in The New York Times last year called, “To Fall In Love With Anyone, Do This.” It was based off a 20 year old study in which a psychologist successfully got two strangers to fall in love in his lab. In this love experiment you answer a bunch of questions with a partner, and then you stare into each other’s eyes for 4 minutes.

I’ve done eye gazing before on a spiritual retreat. The experience is deeply moving if you haven’t done it before.

In the words of the article’s author, “I know the eyes are the windows to the soul or whatever, but the real crux of the moment was not just that I was really seeing someone, but that I was seeing someone really seeing me. Once I embraced the terror of this realization and gave it time to subside, I arrived somewhere unexpected. I felt brave, and in a state of wonder. Part of that wonder was at my own vulnerability and part was the weird kind of wonder you get from saying a word over and over until it loses its meaning and becomes what it actually is: an assemblage of sounds.”

So because I don’t want you to have to have a partner for this, and because this is all about getting good with you, you’re going to stare into your own eyes for 4 minutes. I’m not going to say too much more about it because I want you to experience it for yourself. As much as possible let your mind go and be interested in exploring whatever might come up.

And extra credit: if you do have someone in your life who’s down to do the eye gazing with you, try it out. Doing it with a partner can amp up the vulnerability and really heighten the emotional experience in being witnessed by someone else.


today's affirmation

I see myself, and I am a beautiful person.